Winter Jam 2013

A few weeks ago I had taken Baylee to a doctor's appointment in Little Rock. On the way home we passed by Verizon Arena and she saw TobyMac on the sign advertising Winter Jam. She was immediately excited and ready to go, so I knew this affordable, family friendly concert, featuring several of the top Christian artists would be perfect for us. And, boy, was I right!

After a morning of downpour rain, we were prepared to freeze and get soaked. We ran home quickly after church, threw on some comfy, warm clothes and I grabbed the ponchos. We were back at the church by 1 to lad the bus and, luckily, by the time we ate lunch and drove to Verizon, the rain let up and we stayed dry!!

Winter Jam doesn't require tickets. It's $10 at the door and a first come, first serve basis. So you know what that means? Get there early and wait outside with the rest of the central Arkansas! ;) We stood outside, packed like sardines, close to two hours and cheered when they opened the doors 20 minutes early. :)

I was amazed to see how quickly the place filled up! This was our view and I loved it!

Other than TobyMac, the girls were excited to see Jamie Grace. She was fabulous!!! 

We loved something from all of the performers. Red, a hard rock Christian band, was there and I'll be honest. It was a little bit out of my comfort zone. But that didn't stop me bobbing my head and keeping up with the beat. Bay leaned over during their performance and said "I wonder if God likes this kind music?". So right there, in the middle of a crazy loud arena, we had a little life lesson. I told her as long as their music was Biblically sound, I'm sure God didn't have a problem with it. I explained that this group could reach people that artists like Matthew West and NewSong couldn't reach, and vice versa. I hope she'll remember that in years to come and not be quick to judge when things aren't exactly what she's used to. Although, Bay has a bit of a rocker in it. I'm thinking maybe the life lesson could've been just as much for me as it was for her. :)

After intermission and a heart touching performance from Matthew West (side note: His song "Forgiveness" is based on a mother's choice to forgive the drunk driver who killed her daughter and guess what? She was there! Made the song even more real and meaningful), it was time for the headliner, the reason we were there....TobyMac!!

The first thing the girls did when we entered the arena was get a souvenir shirt. Love that neon! 

Brandon gave the girls his old phone, and although it doesn't make calls, it can take pictures & video. Happy girls, right here. :) In fact, at one point Cay said, "I am so happy right now! I'm shaking!". Haha!

If you look in between their heads in this next picture and zoom in, you'll see TobyMac. Love this pic!!

We had such a fun time and I'm glad we all got to experience our first Winter Jam together. I know one of these days the girls will probably want B and I to stay home. But until then, we have these memories to hold onto.

Scatterbrain

I'm not sure what my deal is. I have several half-written posts, but they seem like a bunch of mumble-jumble. They're too wordy and boring so let's go for short and to the point highlights instead, shall we?

* It hit me the other day that the girls are almost in junior high and that means YOUTH GROUP at church. What?! That seems so old. And they seem so not old. I'm really having a hard time wrapping my head around this. 

* Speaking of junior high, Baylee had a mini breakdown about 7th grade last week. We drove by the school they'll go to next year and she was on the verge of panic. It's big. Really big. And she is already overwhelmed. In fact, she was ready to move back to South Carolina and go to school at our church's private academy. You know, with a class size of like 20 for an entire grade! Bless her overwhelmed heart. 

* Caylee is still taking guitar lessons. She's doing quite well, but was struggling in the practice department. Brandon came up with an awesome solution to encourage her to practice. So far it's working like a charm!

* The girls are obsessed with the show Finding Bigfoot. Obsessed. For Christmas Brandon ordered them two FB shirts. He paid for two day shipping and it's been a nightmare. First off, they sent a Honey Boo Boo shirt. Umm, no thank you. Then it was late. Then they sent the same shirt twice. It's been one thing after the other. We were supposed to get two grey shirts and two black shirts. As of yesterday we have two Honey Boo Boo shirts, eight grey shirts, one black shirt, and a credit to reorder the other black shirt because they are tired of messing with us. It's been ridiculous. But the girls love their shirts! They were them all. the. time. 

* We are all still adjusting to Annie, our goldendoodle puppy we got at Christmas. She's a little love. Here's the quick backstory how we got her... I was reading a blog one day in November and I saw this sweet baby. She lived in Russia, had down syndrome, and needed to be adopted. My heart went out to her and I just assumed B's would too. Wrong. I actually tried to have a serious "can we talk about something" talk and he wasn't having any part of it. In his words, "I'm not going to fund terrorism" and the discussion was closed. And I was mad. (And now Russia won't allow us to adopt anyway, so I guess it was for the best.) Then a couple weeks later we were leaving Petsmart and man was walking in with his golden doodle, my dream dog. We got in the car and I looked at B and said "Will you get me a goldendoodle for Christmas?". By the end of the day he had set up and appointment to go look at puppies the next day. So, I didn't get a Russian baby, but I did get a puppy. 

* I am about 30 pounds away from a HUGE weight loss milestone. I can't wait to hit it and share with you all my journey so far. I remember starting this almost a year ago and losing 10 pounds seemed unattainable. And now I am so close from my first major goal. Baby steps every day...

* Washing machines should never be taken for granted. I've been without mine for 11 days and counting and I'm about to pull my hair out. The water that won't drain is nasty and STINKS. Laundromats are expensive, but friends are sweet. Thankful for those who've opened their washers to us! 

* Jehovah-Nissi, God our Banner, never ceases to amaze me. The way He goes before us in everything astounds me. We've had a glimpse this week of some things and it's reminded me that He is always in control... even when I want to be. Ha! ;)

* Brandon bought some Valentine's peanut M&Ms the other day. He had them on his nightstand and the girls saw them before we left for school the other day. I took them to school and when I came home I noticed the M&Ms were missing. Initially I thought the girls had been silly and hid them. And then I saw the bag peaking out from under my bed. The culprit? Molly. She ate almost an entire bag of peanut M&Ms and had absolutely no remorse. I hope she enjoyed her entire day in her crate for that little escapade!

Alright, that's all I have for now. I have bounced from here to there. Welcome to my brain. Ha! 

Looking back, moving forward

Our Christmas cards this year turned into a Christmas package. It was kind of ridiculous. Bran and I found some pretty cards after Thanksgiving and I thought I'd simply sign them and send them on their way. But then I started thinking about our past year. It needed to be documented. So I decided to write a letter. The wordy person that I can be tried to relive our year month by month. And then I realized going that way would result in a Christmas novel instead of a letter, so I scratched the idea. I still wanted to personalize our card so I ordered a family picture to stuff inside. Done. Not what I wanted, but it would work. But then as I laid my head down late one night I couldn't sleep and it hit me. I had asked each family member their top 10 moments of 2012 (up until December) and somehow managed to piece together a short and sweet letter incorporating our top 10's. I had some fun Christmas paper I bought years ago so I printed a few and waited until the next morning to show Brandon. And then I remembered the pictures I ordered. And all I could do was laugh. Our simple card turned into this crazy package. It was probably Beaver overload, but it had been a few years since we had sent anything out. I guess I was overcompensating. ;)

With the new year here and Brandon and the girls back at work and school, I can't help but think about our past year and those top 10 moments. 2012 was packed full of memories and will forever go down as one of my most memorable years. We had so many new adventures in South Carolina to discover, as well as moving to Arkansas (again!). Brandon and I both turned 30. The girls experienced their first true friendship. Life was one wild, unexpected ride in 2012. I am so very grateful for every moment -- yes, even the hard, I have no clue why things are happening this way moments.

Without further ado, here are our Top 10 Moments of 2012...

Baylee

1. Hannah

2. Finding Bigfoot

3. Shark fishing

4. Mrs. Billy's animals

5. Date night with Daddy

6. Beach trips

7. Tex

8. Meeting Mrs. Dykema

9. Pirate's Voyage

10. Petting Niko

Caylee

1. Hannah

2. Mrs. Billy's animals

3. Getting Beau

4. Finding Bigfoot

5. Shark fishing

6. Mrs. Dykema

7. Summer at Grammy & Grandpa's

8. South Carolina Aquarium

9. Going horseback riding on Rosco

10. Petting Niko

Brandon

1. Beach trips

2. Ghost tour

3. Charleston fine dining

4. Shark fishing

5. Thriller 

6. New house

7. PGA Championship

8. France trip

9. Cathedral of Praise

10. Summer date nights

Cari

1. The beach 

2. 30th birthday weekend

3. Cabot graduation weekend

4. Shark fishing

5. Charleston fine dining

6. Getting healthier/losing weight

7. New house

8. Summer date nights

9. Falls Creek

10. Friendship between Baylee, Caylee, and Hannah

I have to be honest. Looking back at these lists, as well as all the other wonderful memories that didn't make the top 10, I can get overwhelmed & find myself sinking into the pits. I still struggle with the "why did we move to SC only to move right back". But over and over I hear the words of a very wise woman (that's you, Terri Kern!).

"Looking back has value; but I'm convinced pressing on has more."

So as this new year begins I will press on. In the words of our church in Charleston, it's my prayer to "have clarity that allows me to hear God's voice above all else; maintain focus on goals set before me; not get overwhelmed about what lies ahead, but instead rest in God's peace; and walk in God's will with absolute purpose".

Brandon and I have set a few goals for this year. While we were talking about our "resolutions" Bran kept reminding me that goals had to be "measurable and attainable", so I did my best to stick within those guidelines. I won't speak for him, but for 2013, here are my goals.

1. Be more content. As B reminded me, "Don't let your mood be based on circumstance."
2. Continue to focus on my health and lose 80 pounds.
3. Run at least three miles of the Arthur Ravenel Jr bridge in Charleston in July.
4. No phone policy from 6-8pm Monday-Thursday.
5. More one on one time with the girls.

Bring it on, 2013. Let's see what you have in store for us this year. We're ready!

Ten years

Pslam 131

My heart is not proud, Lord,

my eyes are not haughty;

I do not concern myself with great matters

or things too wonderful for me.

But I have calmed and quieted myself,

I am like a weaned child with its mother;

like a weaned child I am content.

Israel, put your hope in the LORD

both now and forevermore.

Ten years ago Psalm 131 was my sister’s daily devotional. She never read it, as she was heavily sedated and nearing the end of her nine month battle with an aggressive form of cancer. After she passed late that night I opened her devotion book for comfort and found that day’s reading so very fitting.

Brenna wasn’t concerned with things too great or wonderful for her. And on December 18, 2002 she calmed and quieted her soul and was content in the presence of Jesus. She had put all her hope in Him.

It’s been 10 years. An entire decade since my sister was here with us. How is that even possible? One third of my life has now been lived without her. Unreal. I’m always hesitant to document Brenna’s passing each year. I don’t want to come across as morbid or stuck in the past. But I desperately don’t want her to be forgotten. I don’t want people to forget her unique sense of humor. Her generosity. Her independence. Her smile.

Everyday without her is hard. I long to talk to her. Even yesterday I read a Christmas card for a sister and thought how perfect it would be for her. And then I remember she’s gone. Yes, it’s still gut wrenching, but then I’m reminded she’s not in pain anymore. No more chemotherapy. No more raditation. No more seizures. And the most comfort of all comes from scripture, for it promises to be absent from this body is to be present with the Lord.

I can hear Brenna’s beautiful alto voice now singing praises to her King. I see Velia Kincade and Maguerite Kern in that choir. My Papa Burl and Grandma Arnold are there as well, though they are probably at the river fishing. There is also a young man named Dakota Hawkins there, whom Brenna never met, and I can only wonder if he and Brenna got to witness the beautiful meeting of their mother’s this past Sunday.

And so on this day, when it’s easy to get overwhelmed in grief, I will rejoice in Brenna’s life and rest assured she’s in a much better place. When I find myself sad during this Christmas season, I will remember it’s because of God’s gift, His son Jesus, that Brenna is eternally whole. Praise His name!

Beautiful, Valuable, Enough.

As we slowly learn to make our new house our "home" I'm trying to come up with more meaningful wall art. I've had several prints for years and they've traveled from house to house and I just find a place to "make them work". Some I still love & hold special memories (think a Christmas present from my sister, or a picture of Spavinaw Lake taken, developed, framed, and signed with a sweet note on the back by my late uncle) and I will find special places in this house for them. But I really want to try and redefine our space in this house.

I was mindlessly clicking from pin to pin on Pinterest a couple of weeks ago and I stumbled on this article. It's still strange to think we will have two teenagers in a year and a half. Teen.Agers. Seriously. That's a whole new world (cue the Aladdin music) & I want to navigate through it carefully. This article is spot on! I love the frankness, yet tenderness in the words. I was smiling my way through it until I read number 10. And then the tears came. I don't know if I've ever read anything so perfect for teenage girls. Sure, they will probably roll their eyes at it, but if we can instill those truths deep inside of them early on, hopefully it will save them from some hurt later on down the road.

"You are beautiful. You are valuable You are enough."

When I read those final words a lightbulb came on and I was a woman on a mission. The girls have had a cute zebra bathroom theme for years. We all still loved it, but it was time for a change. Target to the rescue and I found a lovely blue and green shower curtain for their bathroom. New shower curtain meant blank walls. Anyone who knows me knows blank walls don't bother me. I'd rather have them blank for years than to have them filled to the brim with stuff I have settled for.

That article sparked something in me & I knew I needed to incorporate it somehow into their bathroom. I'm not the craftiest of persons, but I like to try (and boy do I want to be crafty!). I've seen all kinds of DIY canvases on Pinterest and I just knew I could find something that would meet me right at my crafty level. I was so excited when I found this. Canvas, magazines, paint...I could totally do this!

I grabbed my old Southern Living magazines and found colors that blended with the shower curtain. I stayed in the blue/green range, but threw in some pops of pinks, yellows, and reds here and there as well. It was fun to not worry about perfection. It was magazine scraps, for crying out loud! And it was going to be completely covered in paint. I did manage to mess up the first canvas I attempted (didn't have the right letters), but never fear I had a spare canvas and started all over. And I LOVE the end result. I mean, I. LOVE. IT. It's exactly what I had in mind.

I tried to be all crafty blooger-like and document the process. Ha!

Magazine scraps hot glued onto the canvas. After my first disaster I learned I had to use vinyl letters for this project to work. So this is take two. And since they were vinyl & reusable I refused to buy two packages of letters so I couldn't lay it all out at once. I kind of had to wing it. A little nerve wracking, but not bad. I kept saying "this isn't supposed to be a polished look so don't worry about perfection". After the letters were in place and pressed down firmly, the fun part came. Paint over it!! 

Yes, you'll see there are two different backgrounds. This pic is from the reject. ;) Once the canvas is completely covered in paint, slowly peel the letters off to reveal your masterpiece. 

(I kind of got too excited to take a picture the moment I peeled all the letters off, so let's go to the final piece, shall we?)

Come on. How perfectly imperfect?! The girls knew I was working on something for their bathroom, but I kept it a secret. I called it "my project", but wouldn't let them watch what I was doing. It drove them nuts! When I was finally finished I got them together to reveal it. I wanted to explain it. I probably got a little deep, but that's okay. This canvas, to me, is a representation of life. It's made up of all kinds of experiences (magazine scraps) that come together to make us who we are. We have the amazing gift of salvation through Jesus Christ that covers up (white paint) a multitude of sin. We are in control of what we choose to reveal to the world (vinyl letters). We are not perfect (crooked, uneven lines and spacing). 

There will be days the girls look in the bathroom mirror and don't like what they see. That's normal. They'll wish their hair was different, or their teeth, or maybe they'll have a huge zit, or...or...or... But they'll have that canvas starring back at them. Whether they believe it or not when they're in the midst of the "drama of the day", they can't escape the truth in those words.

They are beautiful.

They are valuable.

They are enough. 

Catching up...

I seriously do not know how November is almost halfway over. I mean, really. Where'd the days go? And Thanksgiving is next week? Crazy! Ok. So since time has slipped away, so has blogging. But I don't want to forget these days. So let's play catch up!

Pumpkin Carving

Nothing says fall like pumpkins and a night outside carving those babies! This year, though, we did the scraping technique and Bay painted her pumpkin. It was weird not scooping out the guts, but fun nonetheless.

Painter Bay

B cracked me up! He was so meticulous!

Cay was a little on the impatient side, but focused when she needed to.

Ta-da! (Horrible pic, sorry.) 

After we cleaned up our pumpkin mess, it was time for s'mores! I'll take mine minus the chocolate, thank you very much. ;)

Those girls are serious about their s'mores! ;)

Halloween

This year the girls wanted to dress up. And they wanted Bran and I to dress up, too. Since I'm well aware this could be getting very close to their last year when they thinking trick-or-treating is "cool" I was all over it! They wanted us to be a family of pirates. Umm...Yes!! My mascot in high school was a pirate, so I'm a pirate through and through. And my girls are well aware of my pirate fascination.

(Just a couple pics of me with pirates to show my obsession.) :)

B and I didn't go all out with our costumes, but enough to satisfy the girls. When they first threw out the idea Bran said "I'll just get a shirt and put "Arr! I'm a pirate" on it". And for some reason that cracked the girls up and they approved. Easy! I, on the other hand, did try on some regular costumes with them, but went the more practical route with an all black outfit a red scarf tied around my head. Done! 

Daddy helping Cay with her headband. 

"This is the only time I will ever wear eyeliner, Mom." Sure, Baylee, sure. I'll remind you of that one of these days. Or maybe she knows herself better than I do! ;)

Daddy and his girlers. Pics weren't the greatest that night. Girls were being GOOFY! Bay was our fancy buccaneer and Cay was more of the scrappy pirate.

Three lady pirates! 

See! I can't help but kiss a pirate when I see one! ;)

We walked around our new neighborhood. It was a very quiet night. There wasn't a lot of traffic and the houses were hit or miss. We made the best of it and I captured all our silliness with the video camera. 

Ha! That's me. The photog mom lagging behind with multiple cameras! ;)

Bay and her loot. 

B and Cay.

It was a good night and they even scored full size candy bars at one house. That was most definitely the highlight of the night!

Quick trip to Oklahoma!

One of the major perks about being back in Arkansas is the ability to get to OK for a quick weekend. In one weekend we were able to hit up two of my nephews football games, a wedding reception for one of my dearest friends, visit with family and friends, and buy a new kingsize bed! Woohoo! (Been waiting 11 years for that bed. Ha!) I only got pics of my nephews, though. 

Barrett, 10 years old

BJ, 14 years old

Brady, 17 years old 

(It was his senior night and last regular season game. They are still in the playoffs. Go Warriors!)

I've mentioned before that I've always taken the boys down or picked them up or something. Well, it takes a little effort with the older two so I don't want to embarrass them in public (Ha!), so Barrett insisted on running and jumping into my arms. And B captured this pic. Hilarious!!!!!! 

Uncle Bubba and the girlers after Barrett's heartbreaking loss the next day. 

Aunt Cari and the boys. Such handsome (& silly) men.

First guests!

The day we pulled back into our town here in Arkansas we had friends invite us over for dinner. It was such a treat to have a yummy meal with familiar faces after the long drive from South Carolina. We told Josh and Nelleke they would be our first guests as soon as we got a house and we'd have muenster chicken. YUM! This past weekend we finally got to make good on our promise. And it was delightful. The food, the friends, the laughter...it was all good. 

Whew! That was long. But I know one of these days I'll be grateful for recording all of these memories. I think that pretty much caught us up. Except for all the boxes and packing paper that stuck around for a couple of weeks. Our house is beginning to come together slowly but surely. There's nothing on the walls yet, but that'll come in time. Hopefully. ;)